


Hope Lost and Found

by Enonem



Category: Juuni Kokki | Twelve Kingdoms
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 08:32:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17556923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enonem/pseuds/Enonem
Summary: Life in a country with no emperor.





	Hope Lost and Found

"I know things are hard," she said, laying a hand on her lover's arm. "But we cannot stop living just because there is no emperor. Life must continue."

He smiled at her. He had such a sweet smile. "It's not that. I want a family, you know that. But to bring a child into a world where crops fail every other year and youma rampage free... It seems cruel."

"We cannot change that, but we can give En more people. She will be the better for it."

There was a warm glow in his eyes, but he still hesitated.

"Besides," she continued. "It's been 15 years already, surely it will not be long before someone ascends the throne. Our child will probably only spend their first years in a country with no emperor. It will be the opposite of what happened to us."

He laughed and took her hand. "Very well then."

So they married. As soon as they had transferred their allotments and settled in their home together, they wove a ribbon and went to petition the riboku.

Their first ribbon remained tied to an empty branch for two months before they had to give up on it. So did the second one, half a year later.

For a year they stopped trying. A flood came and destroyed most of the crops in the village. Theirs survived, so they helped their neighbours as well as they could.

When they tied the third ribbon, a fruit appeared on the riboku. Hugging and kissing with joy, they went to pray everyday for their child to be born healthy and strong.

 _May you live a happier, safer life than your parents._ She knelt in the shrine as usual when she heard panicked voices from outside. Some people in the shrine dashed for the safety of the tree, thinking it was a youma attack. She was about to do the same when she heard a louder voice. "Shoku!"

Frozen in place, forgetting her own safety, her eyes went to the ranka of her child. She saw with horrible clarity the sky rip open and an unnatural wind grab hold of the fruit and sweep it away. She heard her husband scream, but her voice died in her throat.

After that tragedy, they could never bring themselves to try again and eventually separated. 

—

Five years later, rumours spread that Enki had left Mt. Hou and was travelling the land in search of the emperor. People said that their sufferings would soon be over. She did not take heart. Two months later, her former husband was killed by youma.

—

The hot sun burned on her back and the reflection in the water scorched her face as she crouched in the mud weeding her field. There were more weeds than rice. It was a miracle she still had a field at all.

A horse approached at a gallop and a man was shouting. With a wince of discomfort she straightened up to see what was happening. The rider had come from the city and was riding village to village to spread the news. "Enki has died!" he shouted. Leaving wails of despair in his wake.

For thirty years things had been getting continually worse. She had no hope left to lose.

—

With no emperor and no kirin, En seemed to have been abandoned by Heaven. The news that a new Enka had appeared on Mt. Hou had only just managed to reach what was left of her village, before everything was lost again.

She was foraging in the woods when the earth shook. She threw herself on the ground.

A ferocious wind, unseasonably hot, blew away the handful of nuts that was the product of hours of searching. Panicked animals ran in different directions and she was nearly trampled by a pair of deer.

When it was over she ran to the village, only to find a flooded wreck in its place. The few survivors told her that the earth had cracked open and foul smelling water had exploded out of the fissure. All the houses were destroyed. There was nothing left.

There were whispered rumours that the shoku had come from the South West. From the Yellow sea. Nobody dared voice their fears out loud, but some weeks later, sure enough, the news came that the Enka had been lost in the shoku.

When she heard this, such a tremor came over her that her travelling companions had to restrain her.

She had not thought about that day in years, but now the memories flooded her mind. A shoku had taken her child, her hope for the future. And now a shoku had taken away the last hope of En.

That night she wailed and wept until she dropped unconscious from exhaustion.

—

En came closer and closer to dying. It was said that Enki had returned and after a few years yellow banners were raised in the few shrines that were left. But nobody had the strength to rejoice, let alone the means to go on the Shouzan to meet the kirin.

—

Villages were destroyed and more and more cities barred their gates to the destitute and homeless.

She had been a small child when the last emperor had died. Now, more than forty years later, her life would end in a land that had no hope.

All that was left for her to do was to huddle with few others under a bare riboku in the middle of the day. Youma were circling overhead and it was a question of who would die of thirst under the tree and who would made a desperate run for freedom and be picked off by the flying beasts.

The girl next to her held a baby to her chest. Reckless girl. There was nothing to give that infant except suffering and death.

Soft gasps around her made her look away from the youma. Their refuge lay in the shade of a spur of rock and on top of this was a human figure.

"Who is that?"

"Are they lost?"

"I think that's a child!"

"The poor thing, those youma will kill him soon!"

The people around her discussed the lonely figure, their apathy stirred by temporary curiosity.

She just looked at the boy because the alternative was to look at death.

Slowly, as the boy did not move, the attention of her companions drifted back to the youma, or to the desolate landscape around them. After an indeterminate amount of time, the boy turned to walk away.

A gust of wind blew away the scarf around his head, revealing a flash of golden hair.

By the lack of reaction, she was the only one to have noticed.

Dumbstruck, she kept her eyes fixed on the spot the boy had just vacated and did something she had not done in twenty-five years, since her unborn child had been taken from her.

She joined her hands and prayed. _Taiho, please send us an emperor._

—

She was alone now. All her companions had either died or dispersed. She had been roaming the forests for days. Barely finding enough food to keep walking. Sooner or later she would come across a town that was still standing. That was the only thing that kept her going.

She sat down to rest her aching feet. Too tired to think, she just stared out at the trees surrounding her.

It was almost peaceful. She could almost pretend she was foraging for nuts and taking a rest on her way home. If she closed her eyes, the rustle of the wind in the leaves sounded almost like a chattering crowd in the distance. She chuckled despite herself. Actually it sounded more like a cheering crowd. How did she even remember what that sounded like?

She bolted upright. It was not her imagination, she could actually hear cheers in the wind.

She hurried down the path until an opening in the vegetation showed the valley below.

There was a town there and there were definitely cries of joy coming from it.

Hurrying down the hill despite her weariness, she made it to the gates well before dark. To her increasing surprise, they were open.

She hesitated as she walked through the gates. She had not been in a crowd in years and the sheer number of people was overwhelming. Some people were laughing, other were crying, but it seemed as though the whole town was out in the streets.

A young woman approached her. Seeming not to notice her ragged appearance, she took her by the hand and beamed at her with eyes full of tears. "It's over! Our sufferings are over, are they not?"

The girl left before she could say anything in reply, but now she could make out what everyone was saying under the din.

"An emperor has ascended the throne!"

—

In the town she found good people who gave her food and clean clothes. There were a lot of good people around now that there was an emperor.

She made her way to the capital, like so many others. There was no rational reason for it. Maybe after so much suffering they all just needed to see the emperor with their own eyes. Just to be sure he was real.

She made it to Kankyuu the day before the coronation. The city bore the same scars as the rest of the land. The looming shadow of Ryou'un mountain did not help making it look strong. Nevertheless, joy was contagious in the air.

In the morning she prepared to climb to see the emperor. Looking at all the crowd around her she wondered what she would be able to see. Probably no more than a distant dot in a vaguely human shape. It did not matter. It would be enough.

She made it to the platform and stood waiting. The crowd was eerily silent. Now that the moment was here everyone was afraid it would slip through their fingers.

Suddenly, with no warning, the crowds exploded with cheering.

Even unable to see beyond the heads of the people in front of her, she joined in. 

As the ceremony progressed, the din diminished. Loud cheers replaced by excited whispering.

"He's here! He's really here!"

"Is that the Taiho next to him? He's just a child!"

"I heard he grew up in Hourai. That's a land of happiness, he will certainly save En!"

She did not hear the second part. She was elbowing her way through the crowd before she knew her body was moving. Her heart was pounding so loudly she did not hear people's protests as the pushed them aside, nor the gentler remarks of those who politely let her pass.

In flashes, between heads, she caught glimpses of the Taiho's bright hair and used it to orient herself. Next to him was the emperor. A tall man. That was all she could see.

She went as close as she could and she still had to stand on tiptoe to see above the soldiers.

She saw him. And she knew.

She did not know how she knew, but she did.

He had grown into a handsome young man. Standing serenely in front of his people. The hope of his people, from whom he had been taken away before he ever took breath.

She wept openly as old walls broke around her heart and her emotions flooded forth.

Never looking away from the face of the emperor, she held her arms to her chest, as though holding a baby.

"Welcome back," she whispered through her tears. "Welcome back, my son."

This was enough. She did not plan to meet him. Her village and all its records had been destroyed, she could never prove who she was. She would not even stay in  
Kankyuu, to avoid the temptation. It would only upset his life. She was not his mother.

But he was her son.

And the knowledge that her once lost hope had given hope back to En would be enough to keep her warm through the coming winters.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't give the woman a name for the very simple reason that I wouldn't know where to start to make one up and slapping Gyokuyou on her seemed cheap. So the pronoun game it is.
> 
> (I know rice is not necessarily the most prominent crop in this world. But it's the only one I know anything about growing, so...)


End file.
